Sunday, August 21, 2011

Jobless.

Today was my last day at my job. I woke up and went straight to work. I woke up too late to eat and had to go straight in to my 7 hour shift. So I ate nothing until 8:00pm. Didn't know it was my last day until 7:00pm when they posted the schedule and I saw that I was not scheduled to work the 2nd week of my 2 weeks notice.

I'm a sales associate for a store in the mall. I've been working there for about... 4 months now. And I wouldn't mind continuing to work there, they just make it impossible for me to have a life.
They don't even make the schedule until Saturday. The LAST day of the week. So if you wanted to have plans on Sunday, you can't make them until Saturday night.

Because heaven forbid you try to change your availability. It takes 20 minutes just to say you can't work a certain day or certain hours in a day, and you need a manager to help you log in and type it in.
And heaven forbid you need a manager. It's always "too busy" or just not a good time!
"Come back later," is what I always got. And in my head I replied, "I have a life, and now is the time for me to talk to you. So I guess you will just find out what I have to say when it's happening," ie: quitting.

I tried to talk to her for weeks about me keeping my job through school, changing my availability, and the issues I have with getting my schedule only a day before the week starts. (uhh, I have a life.)
But every time I tried to talk to her she either said "Later," or she wasn't there.

Let's get one thing straight. I don't like work. The ONLY reason I work is because it is necessary.
I believe there are jobs I'm suited for, and jobs I'm not suited for. Once I find the right job I'll be okay with working. But stupid side jobs you have to get just for quick cash are terrible!

Last year I waited tables only as long as I had to to pay rent (4 months). It was a terrible, terrible job. I cried almost every night when I left work. Parked outside of my apartment cleaning tears off my face so my roommate wouldn't know I'd been crying. It was not a good situation and so I got out of it as soon as I could.

I worked the summer before that on a horse farm earning and saving money for rent. I wanted so bad to move out on my own, I worked 9 hour days, 6 days a week. Sometimes more. I traveled from SC to TN to GA weeks at a time for horse shows. That was an experience I didn't mind, and will never forget.

So that 7 months of work held me over so I could live in an apartment for a year. But as soon as that year was up, I jet out of that city and moved back in with my parents.

That's right, I'm back living in the small town. Driving an hour to school 4 days a week in a clunky old F150. 17 miles per gallon. 1 broke headlight. 1 broke tail light. 1 frequently flat tire. And a nice silver tailgate on a dark green body.

Moving out on my own, well, I was just so over it. I had to have this much money by the end of the month to pay rent. I had to be able to afford groceries or I wasn't eating.
Paying for cleaning supplies, electricity, toiletries, groceries.. it's all stuff you take advantage of before you live on your own.
Next thing you know you're stealing toilet paper from public restrooms, taking home extra ketchup packets and napkins from McDonalds, and eating only bread, ramen noodles and water.
(all of this is a true statement of my life.)

So here I am, jobless, living above my parents, trying to figure out where I want to go from here.