How to lose a guy in ten days. (because andy anderson fell in love with the guy and never actually wrote the article.)

“It’s a dating how-to, in reverse.” For those creeps you want absolutely nothing to do with, but you are just too sweet to break their heart.

 

I mean, why is it so, incredibly easy to get the guy that you are totally, completely and utterly not attracted to on the phone, asking you out, and falling in love with you?

 

It’s like the impossible task in reverse.

Because instead of it being impossible to get the guy to notice you, it’s impossible to get the guy to leave you alone.

 

I don't know, maybe it’s not a problem for most girls, but this is my problem. And it’s Logan’s problem. That’s why she is my best friend; we are like in cahoots with our relationship, “issues.”

I remember when we first talked about it, she told me her issue, “He texts me soo much! If I don’t text him back, he re-sends it! And if I ignore THAT he just waits a few hours and starts a whole new conversation. I need my space! He is driving me insane.”

Everyone within a 5-mile radius could hear my shriek of excitement. “Holy bananas, me too!! I hate it, I’m just like, get a life!”

And she goes on to tell me another issue. “Why do I always get the creeps? Let me tell you what he did….”
Then I let out another shriek, “ME TOO!! Why do we get always the creeps??! Remember ghost boy??”

For those of you who don't know, ghost boy is a guy I talked to for a couple weeks in high school, until one night on the phone he just stopped the conversation,

“Woah,” he said. “I just saw a ghost.”

“Umm…”

 

I didn’t know what to say. And then he just kept going about how his house is planted on an old Indian gravesite, and he sees ghosts all the time and now he’s a friend with the ghost and he shuts the doors for him…

Ohhhkay. All of a sudden I was “too tired to talk on the phone,” and “just not ready for a relationship.”

But I just realized that I am an expert at shrugging guys off. I mean, I have got it down to an art. Seriously. Give me one of these nuts and I can make him go from texting me, calling me, stalking, me to wanting nothing to do with me in 10 days. I've got it down so I never have to be mean and break the poor guys heart; it can even boost his confidence and maybe give him a chance with another girl; it allows us to stay friends, after he’s hit creeper mode. And lucky you! I'm going to share with you the best process I have found to do so.

How to take him from freak to friend in just 10 days.

He’s texting you. And it’s obsessive. And all you want is to ignore him. But no, with out flirting reply with as few words as possible until he asks you to hang out.

I know, I know, the last thing you want to do is hang out. But trust me.

So he asks you to hang out on a certain day. Suggest hanging out sooner. He says a new date and time. Agree; tell him you’ll text him tomorrow.

An hour before you’re supposed to hang out, make up an excuse and don't go.

You’ve got to make him anticipate this hang out sesh.

The more he wants it, the easier it is to let him down.

Change the plan to hang out in a few days. Go on with your life, blowing off his texts. When he texts you tell him you’re “getting into the shower”or “about to get to class” or “just sat down for lunch.”

You don’t have to text him until the day of the hangout.

Once you get over there to hang out, do. nothing. Be friendly, don’t be mean, but just sit there.

Complain that you want to do something or play a game - but then suck at the game. Quit the game. Turn on the TV and watch girly movies. When he flirts just ignore it, pretend not to notice. By the end of the night, he’ll either get the point, or just completely be turned away by you.

NOTE: This is only to be practiced on complete creepers who don't know how to take a hint. Or who refuse to take no for an answer.